Sufficient Grace

I was reading in John about the crucifixion of Jesus. I googled crucifixion and this is a short explanation: Crucifixion: Jesus Faced a Horrible Death
Crucifixion sometimes began with a scourging or flogging of the victim’s back. The Romans used a whip called a flagrum, which consisted of small pieces of bone and metal attached to a number of leather strands. The number of blows given to Jesus is not recorded; however, the number of blows in Jewish law was 39 (one less than the 40 called for in the Torah, to prevent a counting error). During the scourging, the skin was ripped from the back, exposing a bloody mass of tissue and bone. Extreme blood loss occurred, often causing death, or at least unconsciousness. In addition to the flogging, Jesus faced severe beating and torment by the Roman soldiers, including the plucking of His beard and the piercing of His scalp with a crown of thorns.

I have heard that Jesus was beaten so badly he was unrecognizable.
I want you to take a moment and get a mental picture of the scene at hand. Got it?
Now I want to take you to another person at this scene. Mary, the mother of Jesus.
John 19:25 Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother.
The Bible doesn't say Mary was screaming uncontrollably or begging for his life or wailing loudly as I no doubt would have been.
Take that in for a minute. Mary is watching this horrific scene before her eyes. Her first born son, her baby boy, her child. How in the world did she not completely lose her mind?
How did she process the amount of emotions that were going through her? Someone said that her heart bled with His wounds. How true that must have been.
You know when your child gets hurt or is sick how it breaks your heart and you wish it were you instead of them. You don't have to be a parent to feel anguish for a child, seeing anyone you love suffer is heart breaking.
Mary was watching her innocent son be beaten and abused. Again there is no mention of her being hysterical.
How is that possible? It can only be possible through grace.
2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
I know this conversation was between Paul and God. Paul was struggling with something and 3 times he asked for it to be taken away and verse 9 is God's reply, the answer was no.
We rattle off a paraphrase of that verse often, “God's grace is sufficient for me” but have you ever REALLY experienced that kind of grace?
How many times have you asked Jesus to remove something from your life that you're suffering from?
It could only be by the grace of God that Mary was able to endure that day.
You don't know what you can bear until you have been tried and some are tested way more than others.
I don't pretend to know why I just know that God's grace is sufficient but being able to say that is not just a cliche for those who live it.
My very dear friend Fran told me a story once about her great granddaughter. She was walking to an ice cream truck with her mother (Fran's granddaughter) and she was hit by a motorcycle. She was ripped right out of her own mothers hand. Fran goes on to tell that she is standing at her great granddaughter's hospital bed with her daughter (the child's grandmother) at her side and her daughter is demanding that she pray the child back to health. They stood there together completely helpless and watched the child die. It was only the grace of God that Fran could even share that story with me.

The story in John goes on that Jesus speaks to his mother and the discipline standing next to her. John 19:26-27 When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to her, “Woman, here is your son,” and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.” From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.
When Jesus takes away one source of comfort He replaces it with another. He knew his mother would still need to be taken care of. God is not only sufficient emotionally and spiritually but physically as well.
Another interesting point here is Jesus called her “woman.” It wasn't being disrespectful it was a term of respect but I think it was more than that.
When your child calls you mommy or daddy it goes right to your heart especially when they are hurting.
I believe Jesus didn't call her mom because it would have been to much for her to bear.
Again, His sufficient grace.
It is only God that can sustain us during life's painful moments. Whether its as horrible as watching your child die or less catastrophic like having to find a new job God's grace is sufficient for you.
I know in my life I have taken that grace for granted when I think “I” handled a situation. The truth is I have only been able to handle what God has given me the strength to handle.
I can't imagine what it was like for Mary but I know she believed in the resurrection and that must have been what she held onto. Knowing she would be with her son again in Heaven.
We too have to hold onto that truth. I have loved ones that I will see in Heaven and that gives me great comfort.
My prayer for you today Gems is first to know Jesus Christ as your Savior, the one who gives you sufficient grace. I pray that when you are tested and you ask God to remove the situation and the answer to that prayer is to go through it not remove it that you will remember Mary and the sufficient grace Christ gave His mother.
I pray that in all things you will understand what Paul meant when he said he would boast about his weakness so God's power could rest on him.
Truly the most powerful time you can experience is when you are so broken and weak that God's power is working in and through you and you are experiencing sufficient grace.
My prayer for you today Gems is to boast about your weakness so others can see God's sufficient grace.

This Dying to Self is Killing Me

Seriously the more like Christ I strive to become the more I find myself saying “I'm dyin here!”

I know that's the point but it can be just plain painful at times.
I don't know about you but sometimes I get tired of the Holy Spirit showing me I'm wrong when I think I'm right.
This of course is my first problem.

Let me give you some scriptures to explain what I'm talking about. (Jesus speaking)

Luke 9:23 Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.

If we want to be a disciple of Christ we must deny our self and take up our cross not just once a week but daily!
What does denying self mean? Glad you asked.
Lately for me denying self means not allowing myself to get offended EVEN when I think I'm right.

I think it's interesting that one of the definitions for offed on dictionary.com was:
(in Biblical use) to cause to fall into sinful ways.
How appropriate. That's exactly what happens. 

You get offended, decide your right and before you know it you have fallen into sinful ways by having resentment or unforgiveness toward another person. You open up a door for the enemy to mess with your mind. He will take a small piece of truth and add his lies to it. You begin to mix your offense with truth.
For me it was having an expectation of someone and when the expectation wasn't met I got my feelings hurt. I started going over the incident in my mind replaying the “offense” and getting my feelings hurt over and over.
I'm not talking about anything earth shattering here.
It can be something as simple as someone not coming through with something they said they would do or not showing up somewhere they said they would.
I shared it with the Lord, again expecting Him to side with me, and this is what the Holy Spirit said to me.
“Gena you can get your feelings hurt and choose to forgive and forget or you can choose to be offended. You can choose being offended, however, that's not an option if your seeking to be more like Christ. You're not allowed to be mad at someone because they didn't meet your expectation. It's just that, your expectation not their responsibility.”
CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!

 It always comes down to our choice. I had to decide what I was going to do with how I felt.

Ephesians 4:22-25 You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

Don't get me wrong I'm not saying you should be someone's doormat. If you are the only one sowing into a relationship than you need to reevaluate that friendship.
The key part here is putting off your desires. They don't have to be deceitful or even wrong desires you just can't expect anyone other than God to meet all the desires of your heart.
Once we get offended it causes dissension in the relationship and if left unchecked or unresolved it can cause a total break up of a valuable relationship.

But my question is where do you draw the line? Do you stop expecting from people completely?
Do I expect nothing from my relationships?

The verse above says to make new the attitude of your mind. How do we do that?
For me it was going back to my situation and deciding what I was going to do. Was I going to wallow in my hurt feelings and allow satan to whisper lies to me like, this friend obviously doesn't really care about you or they would have never done this thing.
Once I died to self I knew that was a lie.

Remember when the popular saying was “what would Jesus do?” Well that my Gems is an everyday question we have to ask ourselves. That's the meaning of taking up our cross daily.
We have to be able to talk to one another and express how we feel. Keep the lines of communication open. The tricky part is after we're done speaking and the other person shares we have to choose again not to take offense.  It's easy to tell someone what bothered you the tough part (dying to self) is hearing how you bothered them. We have to speak and listen and then move forward together. The truth is we get offended so easy and most times the person who offended us doesn't even know they did it. 

One of the reasons I love being involved with the Soup Kitchen and ministering to the homeless is there are no preconceived expectations. They have absolutely nothing to give me nor do I want them to. The people who serve our brothers and sisters do it out of love and no other motive.
To die to self means to constantly ask yourself what is my motive? What do I need or want from this decision?

I'll give you another example using a totally different scenario.
I was at work the other day on the phone with a customer. She was telling me she made a payment on her credit card and gave me the account number it got posted to. I could not find the payment or the account number she gave me. She then told me the credit card payment was changed to a check and mailed to Atlanta. My office is in Florida. Why in the world would the payment go to Atlanta? I never heard of a credit card payment being changed to a check without the customer being the one writing the check? Nothing she was saying made any sense to me and although I didn't let her know it I was getting frustrated with her. To be honest I thought she might be making this whole story up.
When I hung up I made a comment about her to my boss. Something like “I don't know what this lady is talking about, she's crazy or smoking something.”
No harm done right? She didn't know what I said and never would for that matter.

Well later that day my coworker went out to get our mail and guess what was in there? None other than the check, written by the bank not the customer mailed from Atlanta in the amount she said it was.
When I got home that night the Lord reminded me about the flippant comment I made about the customer. He let me know that just because I didn't know what she was talking about didn't make me right and her wrong. The Holy Spirit was grieved that I trashed talked one of God's children because I was frustrated.

I felt so bad I sent a text to my boss apologizing for being a butt head. I had to die to self....
I could go on and on with examples. I am a work in progress. The bottom line is in order for there to be more of Jesus in us we have to get rid of or die more to self.

Every once in a while I'll have a day that more than one person will compliment me. They will tell me I look really pretty or radiant. I have to laugh because my outward appearance hasn't changed much it's just that I decided that day to act more like Jesus.
The Bible says that Jesus was an ordinary looking guy not ugly or really handsome yet people were drawn to Him. If He wasn't this major hotty what were they drawn to?
They were drawn to the love that flowed so freely from Him to anyone He came in contact with.
What people think is attractive in me on those days is the Spirit of Jesus being allowed to flow through me.
The times I feel like it's killing me to die to self are the times I'm focusing more on me than others.
Let's all try to die a little more each day and put on the new self, the one created to be like God .

Is Jesus Still In The People Business?

I’m a prayer warrior and I love to pray for people BUT sometimes it can be overwhelming! I have had soooo many prayer request lately that are huge. People with major diseases or major accidents or just major problems in general. I have to be honest with you the other day I got a prayer request emailed to me and I didn’t open it because my heart felt so heavy I couldn’t bare to read another persons pain.
I honestly could not start one more week without having alone time with the Lord and reading my Bible.
Having a full house right now makes it hard for me to have alone time. I’m not complaining I’m just stating a fact.
I had decided this weekend I wasn’t going anywhere on Sunday no church, not friends, no family. I would do nothing but spend time with the Lord.
Truth is I needed to get some stuff off my chest about this praying thing I was struggling with.
I just wasn’t sure how I was going to find something for the rest of my family to do J
The Lord obviously had the same idea because Anthony, my oldest son, came home that day and told me he was given 5 free tickets to the 3rd Day Concert. The man who was generous enough to give them to him told him they would be at the gate of the concert for him.
Of course he offered to give me one and was planning on buying a ticket for Nathanael (his brother).
I being the generous and needing a plan mom that I am told him to give Nathanael my ticket and I would make the sacrifice and stay home alone.
As soon as they left and the house was quiet I began my conversation with God.
It went something like this;
Lord I totally believe in the power of prayer and I love to pray for people but lately I feel like I’m wasting my time. There are more request than answers and you said we would be able to do greater things than Jesus and I haven’t performed one miracle or prayed one person well never less raise someone from the dead. There are people hurting EVERYWHERE and I don’t have any answers. Are you still answering prayers Lord? Are you still in the people business?
Of course I know the answer is yes but I’m just being real here with you Gems.
I started to read my Bible hoping some great answer would jump off the page at me.
Then my mind started wandering to my kids. I prayed for them to be safe and have a good time and then I started thinking about parking. Oh my gosh,
they would probably need money to park and I know none of them had any cash. I prayed the Lord would handle it.
That was about the biggest prayer request I could handle at that point.
I had a good time with the Lord and was feeling a little better when I heard the door open and in came my gang who promptly crawled onto my bed with me.
I could not believe 4 hours went by that quick. Why doesn’t work go that fast?
They were all excited about their night and what a good time they had and couldn’t wait to tell me what happened.
When they got to the concert they indeed needed money to park. Anthony said they drove a little ways down the road and there was a dirt road right by the parking lot and as luck would have it his car fit right in. Parking problem solved.
As they headed toward the gate they met a woman who was giving away a free ticket and she asked if they needed it. Anthony said no they had tickets, thanked her and they continued on their way.
When they got to the gate there was a mix up and there were only 4 tickets there. Did I mention they had no cash? They quickly went back into the crowd and found the woman with the free ticket and she gave it to them.
What are the chances they found her and she still had it….. Hmmmm sounds like God is still in the people business.

I went to work the next day and my dear friend April called me and we decided to meet for lunch. I told April I would meet her at the McDonalds near my job. When I got there she wasn’t there so I waited a few minutes. Then it hit me, I knew she was at the wrong McDonalds. I called and sure enough she was at a different one. I was sure I told her I was in the Target shopping Center.
I drove to meet her and when I got there she too was feeling overwhelmed. April does local outreach for our church and does an amazing job. We have a huge church and I can’t begin to tell you the amount of people she and her team ministers to. My prayer list was mi-nute compared to the amount of people she was reaching out to.
I love people like April because you can be real with her. I was asking her the same thing I told you. Is Jesus still in the people business?
It’s all too much, how do we keep it together? How do we minister to all these people?
April also has a real heart for people and we both had heavy hearts.

We were sitting at a table next to the window and it was really cold outside. We both looked out the window at the same time and saw a man with a small boy about 3 walking toward the building. What caught our attention was the fact that the man had on a nice warm coat but the little boy only had on a light sweat shirt and was bare foot.
It was way to cold a day for bare feet. They came into McDonalds and went into the bathroom that April and I just happened to be sitting near.
We both just looked at each other and didn’t have to say a word we knew we would talk to him when he came out.
As he went by us on his way toward the front I asked him if the boy needed shoes and he said yes. It ended up there was a little girl 2 years old with him too. She was not only bare foot but had no jacket at all!
Both children were pretty dirty and the little girl’s hair was matted in the back.
April and I packed up our stuff and followed them out the door. The children were handed off to another woman, who also had on a nice warm jacked. We asked her to meet us at the Big Lott in the shopping Center so we could buy the children some shoes and she agreed.
April and I picked out socks and shoes for the children who were very excited to have something on their feet. We asked the woman if she knew what size shoe they wore and she didn’t.
Gems their little feet were so black from the road and they had cuts on their feet and toes. They had been bare foot a while. We fit them for shoes and proceeded to look for jackets. We had to go the Bealls Outlet next door for those. The children talked and talked and the woman just followed us around, she seemed detached and to be honest pretty emotionless. The little girl lifted her arms up and asked April to carry her it was all we could do not to burst into tears.
April and I continued to speak with our eyes. Why were the adults in warm clothes and able to buy cigarettes and these children were without even a pair of shoes. None of that mattered now it was about the 2 toddlers in front of us.
As I put on the boys new coat I told him that Jesus loved him. I could tell by his expression he had no idea what I was talking about.
Later when April was helping him pick out a toy, yes we bought them a toy; she too told him that Jesus loved him.
Then the sweetest thing happened. He looked up at April with his little freckled face and asked why she was at McDonalds. April told him Jesus sent her there for him; he then asked “was Jesus at McDonalds too?”
The Lord spoke to me right there and then. “Yes Gena, I’m still in the people business and this is how you do it. One person at a time.”
You better believe Jesus was at McDonalds!
God had April and I meet that day with the same heart, sent April to the “wrong” McDonalds, the extra time it took me to drive there was the exact time needed for April and I to have a chance to share our hearts and then be ready to see these precious little children with no shoes.
April and I were humbled and honored to be Jesus today and as always all of us were ministered to.
Jesus cares about little things like parking places and concert tickets and he cares about big things like children who are cold and need shoes.
Jesus is still in the people business and He’s hoping we are too.

Enduring Love

I have been thinking quite a bit about the love of God. The description God uses for himself is love. When we think of all the things God has created and how mighty and powerful He is it's odd that he chooses to describe Himself as love.
Definition on Dictionary.com of Love: The benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God.
I don't think I will ever really understand God's capacity of love when it relates to us humans.
I'm going to be honest here with you Gems lately I have been feeling kind of numb in the love emotion.
I know I love. I love my kids and my friends. I have love for the homeless and really people in general but I haven't been “feeling” love. I can't really explain it.
I'll participate in an act of love like helping the needy or ministering to a hurting person and my heart is sincere in my actions but my emotions seem to be a bit detached. Have you ever felt this way?
I started asking God about it and pretty much asking if I was getting hard hardhearted or worse yet cynical.
The Lord showed me three things that I will share with you. If you have felt this way perhaps it will shed some light on your feelings as well.
The first thing He showed me had to do with obedience.
Loving people is not about feeling like it, it's about obeying what God told us to do.
God told us to love one another, period. There was nothing about if you feel like it or if they are worthy or if they even want you to.
Love is a decision more than a feeling at times. I'm sure you can relate.
I know in my life there are many times I had to decide to love someone and forget how I felt.
The second thing I felt the Lord was telling me had to do with emotions. Because I'm such an emotional person, I know that shocks you, He was doing a new work in my emotions.
When your emotional and you reach out to the hurting it's easy to get so wrapped up in the emotion of it all you don't always say or do the tough stuff. Sometimes you need to give advice or take hold of a situation that requires tough love or make a hard decision.
I think in the days ahead our lives are going to change drastically because of our Countries decisions and our own personal decisions. Life as we know it is going to change and we will get a taste of what our grandparents dealt with.
I think the Lord is preparing my heart to be strong so I can continue to be a help to the people around me. Another part of that is being able to guard your heart so you don't get your feelings hurt easily or again you won't be effective.
The third thing the Lord showed me was in Psalms 136. I'm not going to write the whole thing but as always I encourage you to read it. I do want to point out a few verses.
His love endures forever. This phrase is between every verse you read in this Psalm, for example:
1 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good.
His love endures forever.
2 Give thanks to the God of gods
His love endures forever.
3 Give thanks to the Lord of lords:
His love endures forever.
It continues this way to the end of the chapter. It's a reminder to us that in everything God does His love endures forever.
It's great to say God is good and to feel his love when He is taking care of us or protecting us and life in general is good.
BUT what if things are happening that you don't think are good. What if you are being persecuted or dealing with depression or sickness. What if you have been waiting for something you know God promised you and it's been years and it still hasn't happened? What then? Is His love still good? Do you still feel loved?
Let's look at a couple of verses further down in the chapter.
17 to him who struck down great kings,
His love endures forever.
18 and killed mighty kings—
His love endures forever.
Struck down and killed... Sometimes what looks horrible in the worlds eyes could very well be part of God's plan.
As I have been pondering on this whole love thing the Lord reminded me that He alone is God and His plan will go forward whether I think it's fair or not.
The thing I and perhaps you need to remember is the Bible says He will work out all things for the good to those who love Him. Gems, we don't get to decide what "good" looks like.
BUT do you love Him and feel loved when things are not going the way you want?
What if your situation didn't change? What if where your at is where your staying?
Do you still give thanks to the Lord for He is good and know His love endures forever?
The second part of our definition of love was the reverent (deeply respecting) affection due from them ( his creation) to God.
The Creator loved his creations (us) and our reverence is due Him.
Interesting...
Our reverence is due Him because He loves us and His love endures forever. It endures through all the junk we give Him. It endures through all the injustice in the world and it endures when He's teaching you a tough lesson.

I had a situation happen today that really hurt my feelings and to be honest I'm kind of glad it happened. It made me realize my feelings and emotions are working just fine. I still had them and they obviously could still be hurt.
When my feelings are hurt
His love endures forever
When I feel betrayed
His love endures forever
Gems we need to write our own life verse daily.
God is love. I don't always understand it but I am thankful for it.
I pray I will be found worthy of the job He has for me in the days to come. I pray I will continue to rejoice and praise Him no matter what my circumstances are and I'm thankful there is a difference between hard hardhearted and discerning.
If you are in a place where you feel your “feeling” different perhaps the Holy Spirit is getting you ready for a journey too.
Ask Him to reveal His plan to you and give thanks until He does cause He is good and His love endures forever no matter what your circumstances look like.