Waiting With Wisdom

This is my grandson Ezra! One of the things I love about going to see him and his brothers is when I get to the door and knock. I can hear him running to the door as I call his name and excitedly announce "Ezra it's Nana!"
He will pull the curtain back and this is the face I see! My heart immediately melts and I can't wait to hear him tell me all about his day and any other thought he cares to share. He has my complete attention.

It got me thinking about the Lord and His relationship with us. Gems do you understand how excited He is when we take time out of our day to call on Him, to tell Him all about our day and any other thought that's in our head. When our face pops up in the throne room of God how does it look?

My jewel today is about waiting on God....... 
There are times when we are in the waiting period that seems to go on FOOOR EEEVVVEERRR ! Our image may look more like the picture below than that smiling face above. 

The only thing harder than keeping yourself encouraged during these times is keeping other people encouraged. Sometimes those who are watching or judging your life are more work than the waiting itself. I'm sure Job can relate to that. His friends were all to eager to tell him what he was doing wrong. I can tell you  from my personal experience lately it can mess with your self esteem. It can make you second guess your whole journey with the Lord when the waiting continues but the circumstances don't change.


But the Bible actually gives us some guide lines on how to handle the waiting and the wondering and for me a lot of times the wandering. That is what I want to share with you today.

There is a wonderful promise complete with a blessing when we wait properly.

Isaiah 64:4 For from days of old they have not heard or perceived by ear, Nor has the eye seen a God besides You, who acts in behalf of the one who waits for Him.

If I succumb to the should haves and what if's I'm saying that the Holy Spirit wasn't in complete control of my entire life. He was with me in my past, my present and my future and He works in my behalf when I wait on Him.

So how do I wait in a way that brings God glory?

Not gonna lie the first way is probably the hardest. Psalm 37:7 

Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him

I'm not even going to comment on that, you get it.

Psalm 62:1 My soul waits in silence for God only.

I think this is just plain good advice. Advice I should have taken sooner. The truth is friends, we, I talk to too many people asking what they think God is doing. Well how the heck do they know! That's a lot of pressure to put on someone, unless they have been on their face before the Lord praying for you their guess is as good as ours, a guess.  We have to be silent at times to even hear the Holy Spirit.

Psalms 27:13 I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord In the land of the living.

We have to believe what God told us or trust me you will despair! We have to expect it to happen when the Lord decides it's the best time for everyone involved.

Psalm 27:14 Wait for the Lord;

Be strong and let your heart take courage;
Yes, wait for the Lord.

Psalm 130:5 I wait for the Lord, my soul does wait,
And in His word do I hope.

Waiting is not for wimps! You have to be relentless in your commitment to stay strong and have courage. Depression, defeat and doubt are definite blows that will assail you. You have to remind yourself daily that your hope is in the Lord not yourself, your friends or your family. You need to STAND on God's word. 

Sometimes the waiting is because other people who are part of the equation are not listening to the Holy Spirit which can cause a clog in the whole pipeline. UGH how frustrating is that! 

The thing to remember Gems is in the end God's will happens it just may take a little longer. 

Psalm 119:74 May those who fear You see me and be glad,

Because I wait for Your word.
I'm doing my best to wait for God's word in a way that pleases Him even on the days, especially the days, that I feel more like the skeleton than Ezra. Trust me I have them but my hope for those who are witnessing my life, the yay and naysayers, that in the end you will all be glad because I waited for the word of the Lord. I want to be encouraging to all that I meet that God is faithful. That when I truly trust, His load is easy and His burden light.

In the meantime I continue trying to do everything as unto the Lord. I don't stop living or existing as I wait. I get up every morning and ask the Holy Spirit what He wants to do with the day He's given me. I try to be Jesus with skin on to any one I encounter each day. I give a smile or a word of encouragement. I write a Gena's Jewel and try to be real with my Gems so they don't feel alone. I'm not allowing waiting to replace living.
This is my life verse for this season and I remind myself as often as I need to, feel free to use it in your waiting ....

Get A Glimpse

So I got yet another glimpse into myself a few weeks ago....

I was at a conference with a friend I won’t tell you which one to protect the innocent :)

There were a lot of amazing Godly speakers and praise music so you would have thought I would have been Christ like for the entire event.  Not the case.

There was also a photographer there as you would expect during a conference. The photographer was doing her job taking pictures.

I don’t know if you have ever paid attention to that but if you have attention deficit like me you can’t help but notice what others don’t. As she took pictures, many one after the other you could here the camera click as she was snapping the photos.

After a while it got on my nerves and I said to the woman sitting next to me (you  think I would have learned by now to keep my comments to myself but NOOOOO) “that photographer is so distracting.”

The woman gave a polite smile and went back to listening to the speaker.

There was a break between speakers and I went to get a drink. When I came back the event had started and I was in the back of the room.

At this time the main speaker gets up to share and as she walks across the stage I notice the friend who invited me waving her hand at me to come up to the front where she was sitting.

I thought to myself how sweet she saved me a front row seat and doesn’t want me to miss the amazing testimony that was getting ready to be shared.

I made my way through the sea of people and sat next to my friend. This is where what I call the Holy Spirit hokey pokey comes in.

My friend leans into me and says “the photographer had to leave and the Lord told me to have YOU take the pictures.”

She then mentioned this was the main speaker so make “sure you get some great shots.”

WHAT!!!!! I could here the Holy Spirit say “let’s see what you got.”

Gems I truly cannot make this stuff up.  

First of all it was one of those cameras that you had to self focus, you know the ones with the long lens.

That would have been hard enough but it was also digital so I had to look and see if the pics were clear which would have been kinda OK if I had glasses on and could actually see them.

I was freaking out! I now understood why the real photographer was taking so many pictures. The subject was not standing still and of course was talking the whole time so you had to shoot a lot to hopefully get one good picture.

I had become the distracting clicking away camera woman.

This of course got me thinking about how quick we are to judge others when we have no idea what their going through.

Luke 6:37 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.

It’s so easy to run your mouth about someone else until you’re running in their shoes. I know this isn’t a new teaching, more of a reminder for me that I thought I would share with you.

We have to be careful about even our thoughts. True, I didn’t

really say anything mean about this photographer but somewhere in my mind I obviously thought I could do a better job.

Did I mention the first picture I took the lens fell off the camera and hit the floor?

It was a humbling moment and Gems, I’m happy for them.

They keep me real and hopefully from becoming self righteous.

I’m so thankful that when my Father asks me to get a glimpse of what’s inside my head He does it to correct my thinking. He does it so I don’t lose my love walk for my brothers and sisters or more importantly His sons and daughters.

Thank you Jesus for giving me a glimpse into my head and heart and for loving me anyway. Thank you God that you don’t keep the bad pics of me on record because all you see is Jesus. Thank you Holy Spirit for the new portrait you took of me that day.

"My What Big Teeth You Have"

I don't know if I ever told you, but 4 year old's are my favorites. I love that they are so honest but not yet mean. They just state facts but most times not with a goal of hurting your feelings. If you want to know if your breath stinks or if your outfit is ugly just ask a 4 year old.

I have been working as a substitute teacher for the school my oldest daughter Amanda has the privilege of being a Director for. A pretty amazing Director I might add. When I fill in  I always hope to work with 4 year olds and did so a few weeks ago.


We were playing, yes I play, on the playground and having fun when I noticed a little girl kind of staring at my face. I knew right away I was about to experience a truth. She walked closer to me as if to get a better look and said with her face kind of crinkled "Your front teeth are bigger then the rest of your teeth, they aren't the same and honestly it's just kind of weird."  She then ran off to make some other great discovery.  Had I thought of it sooner I would have said "the better to eat you with" just kidding, maybe....



The other thing I love about 4 year old's is they believe what you tell them. This can work for or against them so please be careful what you say to these precious souls. On the playground we have monkey bars and I was encouraging each child as they attempted to get from one side to the other.

We have one little boy we will call Tom, he is not as athletic as some of the other children and usually just sits in a chair but I guess the excitement of the situation cried louder to his heart than his fear and he ventured over to us. 
By now we had quite a line of children waiting impatiently for their turn. His first attempt he fell off immediately and he looked up with a face of embarrassment and defeat . I explained to Tom that the first part of getting across was getting his arms strong and to do this he just needed to hang for a few seconds. He went to the back of the line to try again.
I started a chant with the kids using each child's name and clapping as they began their descent,  the other teachers were amazed at how long the line was and the anticipation the kids had as they cheered for their ninja warriors!!
Each time Tom hung a little longer and looked up at me for approval which of course he got. Finally we began to count the seconds he was able to hang and when he hit TEN we all roared with elation at his great accomplishment!! Tom hit the ground then stood up quickly and not looking at anyone but cheering himself on shouted YES!!!!!

I'll tell ya Gems it was awesome! My eyes filled with tears as I ran over to Tom to give him a well deserved high five.

So what's my point? 

Well for my first story the little girl pointed out an obvious observation to me about my teeth. I didn't run to the nearest mirror to study my mouth and suddenly realize my front teeth were bigger. I kind of knew that from years of teasing not just from kids but adults as well. Was it just plain weird, maybe but it was my weird and I have embraced it.
I think we all struggle with some personal trait about ourselves but I want to encourage you to just be you and celebrate what you think are your strengths and your "weirdness."  God created all of you and He thinks your beautiful/handsome. 
If I let my big teeth issue consume me I would never smile and that would be awful.

As for Tom he sat in that chair daily because he didn't think he could do what the other kids do. He had so much courage that day to climb those bars with all of us watching and to get up after the first fall and get back in line to try again, It was a site to behold. I made sure to tell his mom so they could celebrate as a family that night Tom's achievement.

So what fear do you have? What do you think you can't do that everyone else is doing?
Whatever it is I hope today you hear the Holy Spirit and a host of angels chanting your name, clapping their hands in anticipation of you stepping out in faith to the challenge God has put on your heart today,  I promise He won't leave you hanging!

Last thing, make sure you say things in love especially when it's a truth a person may already be struggling with. Encourage one another, heck cheer them on and celebrate when they accomplish the task EVEN if it would have been easy for you. Make sure you speak life to those who will believe what you say. Play nice.

Go Deep

Well it’s been a while since I’ve done a shout out Gems so I thought I would check in. It has been an emotional few months to say the least.  My last assignment ended March 17^th. I originally thought it would be the end of April but the Lord had other plans. 

My youngest daughter was married on May 21^st.  I’m thankful the Lord gave me the month of May off as there were so many things to do preparing for the wedding, not to mention the emotional cycle of your baby getting married that transpired.

As a reminder, without a job means without a regular paycheck. I was short about $300. to pay for all my bills but had comfort knowing God chose the time I would leave my job and has promised to always take care of me. It’s these times that the verse “why do you worry about what you will eat or what you will wear or where you will live” come alive!

I had no idea how God would provide and honestly Gems that is part of the, dare I say fun, waiting to see how the Lord will move forward.  For this month He blessed me from my mother. I got a check in the mail for $701 from a life insurance policy I didn’t know my mother had.

It was actually sweet feeling like my mom had a part in the Lord’s financial plan for me.

So now it’s June 1^st and I haven’t had an update from the Holy Spirit on what the next plan is. So I wait……. I have been offered a part time summer job but don’t feel the Lord leading me to accept.

I don’t know why the Lord chose me to walk this path. It started in 2007 when the market crashed, my job ended and I lost both my home and investment property. I began a walk of faith as a single mother that has taken me on a ten year journey. A journey that has been exciting and terrifying. It has been packed with new people and different places and at times so lonely my heart aches.

I never know when an assignment will begin or end. I don’t know how long it will be between assignments. The first 2 ½ years I had no income at all but I traveled more than I ever had and began a personal intimate relationship with the Lord I didn’t know could exist.

Now here I am 10 years later still walking this unexplained journey.

My newly married daughter Jessica came over the other day and we were sitting on the couch together just sharing where we are in our walk with the Lord. It was a day I needed some encouragement and I was telling my daughter and myself that we may make plans but the Lord ultimately directs our steps. I told her I really needed to hear a word from God to keep me focused.

I remembered years ago the Lord giving me a Psalm for each of my children so I pulled out my old bible to find the one He gave me for Jessica. At least that’s what I thought I was doing. I had to go through the whole book of Psalms and as I turned the pages I would randomly read out loud some of the verses I had highlighted over the years.

I make the word personal as I read so what the Lord spoke to me that day went something like this.

“Gena will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord make me dwell in safety.  In the morning O Lord you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.  You surround me with your favor as with a shield.  The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble, you have never forsaken me when I seek you.  I have set the Lord always before me. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

I will be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. The Lord is the strength of His people.  Surely God is my help, the Lord is the one who sustains me.

If I cast my cares on the Lord He will sustain me. By this I know that God is for me. Come and see what God has done, how awesome His word in my behalf.

Come and listen all you who fear God; let me tell you what He has done for me!!!

The last verse really hit me.  “Come and listen all you who fear God; let me tell you what He has done for me!”

This Gems is where the deeper moment came…..

Why? Why do I walk this journey? Why the weeks, months or years between assignments (jobs)? Why the total dependence on God? Why me?

You see I’m really not all that important. Why would the star breathing, ocean forming, eternal universe making God of holiness invest so much time in me?

I’m not being melodramatic here, I’m sure many of my friends and family have asked the same thing. Perhaps you have asked yourself that question.

In Luke 9 Jesus gives clear instructions to His disciples; these instructions would also apply to me as I too am a disciple of Jesus Christ.

“And He called the twelve together, and gave them power and authority over all the demons and to heal diseases.

 

Jesus told us we would have the power to cast out demons and raise people from the dead.

John 14:12 Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do, he will do also; and greater works than these he will do; because I go to the Father.

I know for sure I have never physically raised anyone from the dead. I have prayed in faith for many to be healed but have not personally healed anyone never less everywhere.

I have a small blog and have written a few books but I’m not a New York Times Best Selling Author. I’m pretty sure not everyone in my OWN family has read my books. The truth is I have given away more books than I have actually sold.

I have a pretty sketchy past that thank you Jesus I’m forgiven for and a present I’m totally blessed with. I have children and grand children that fill my heart with love and friends that have become my family that I can laugh and cry with BUT I am pretty much an ordinary woman. There is nothing truly supernatural about me or my life.

At times I get caught up with the works mentality. I find myself thinking I better get busy doing something for the Lord!  If I’m not going to raise dead people or start a miraculous  healing ministry how can I expect Him to take care of me financially between gigs right?

Do you ever experience that? Do you think God NEEDS you to perform His works or have you come to the realization that He can do all things without you? Obviously God can use all of us but we are not on a spiritual time clock. Performance is a world standard not a Heaven one.

So the deep question I am pondering here, right now, is why Lord?

I go back to His word, as revelation can only come from the Revealer.

The Bible says God formed me,that He knit me together in my mother’s womb.

Psalm 139:16

¹⁶ Your eyes have seen my unformed substance;
And in Your book were all written
The days that were ordained for me,
When as yet there was not one of them.

So God knew “my book” if you will was not going to be all that exciting yet He chooses to pull me away from the world for lengths of time to be alone with Him. Why Lord?

As cliché as it may be the answer is LOVE. My Father loves ME!

Honestly at times I can’t wrap my mind around that.

Ephesians 3: 16 I pray that out of the riches of His glory, He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 may have power, together with all the saints, to comprehend the length and width and height and depth of His love, 19 and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.…

That dear Gems is deep. Those are Christ words to me and to you.

Who am I to tell God how to love me. He knows me better than anyone, He created me and He knows my love language.  It’s quality time, I grew up in a life of rejection and have scars to prove it. I have made bad and good decisions because of rejection. The enemy has tried to take me out using rejection BUT GOD has taken me on a long deep journey so today June 2^nd 2017 I could finally grasp how much He loves me.

I am overwhelmed with emotion even as I type this. I finally get it. It has never been about me or my writing or my volunteering or my parenting. It’s never been about anything I can do it’s all about what I can accept. God’s unconditional love!

For God so loved Gena that He gave His only begotten son that who so ever believes in Him shall not perish but have ever lasting life!

God wants me to seek Him the way I would seek a career or money to pay rent. He wants me to know that I know He is trustworthy. That I can be a living example of being provided for in every way by my creator. That my story can be a testimony of His love and encourage others to write their own story. It can be as deep as you allow Him to go with you.

What makes us extraordinary is being loved by a phenomenal, remarkable, unexplainable, wonderful, mighty, everlasting Father.

I pray you will go deeper with the Lord and experience your love language with Him how ever that looks, where ever it may take you, go deep……..

Megaphone Man

I was recently in Tampa for jury duty and outside the courthouse was a man standing on a step ladder with a megaphone preaching the word of God.

Most people passed him by ignoring his existence, others rolled their eyes and continued on their way. I of course listened as long as I could to see if he was preaching in love.   When I came out for lunch break there was a much younger man, maybe in his 20's, talking to the megaphone evangelist. He was polite and offered him some suggestions on his technique. An hour later when I returned the two were still in deep conversation and I heard the younger man say "I just think if you changed your approach and spoke one on one your message would be more effective."

As your reading this you may agree with the younger man. I have heard it said many times that people preaching from a street corner were wasting their time, but are they?

Jeremiah was only about 17 when God called him and he was heart broken over the fate of his people, he begged them to listen to him. Did you know he was known as the "weeping prophet" not just because he cried for what was going to happen to them, he cried because no matter how hard he tried no one would listen to him! He was single and all his friends turned on him so not only was he overcome with sadness he was lonely. I'm pretty sure God was the one who not only called Jeremiah but told him what to say.

Jeremiah 1   Now the word of the Lord came to me saying, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, And before you were born I consecrated you; I have appointed you a prophet to the nations.”  Then I said, “Alas, Lord God! Behold, I do not know how to speak, Because I am a youth.”  But the Lord said to me, “Do not say, ‘I am a youth,’
Because everywhere I send you, you shall go, And all that I command you, you shall speak.
“Do not be afraid of them, For I am with you to deliver you,” declares the Lord.  Then the Lord stretched out His hand and touched my mouth, and the Lord said to me, “Behold, I have put My words in your mouth. “See, I have appointed you this day over the nations and over the kingdoms, To pluck up and to break down, To destroy and to overthrow, To build and to plant.”

Perhaps our Megaphone preacher has a lot in common with Jeremiah.

Then we have John the Baptist, also known as John the Baptizer, he spoke to crowds wherever he went. He was definitely considered weird as he wore clothes of camel's hair and ate locust and wild honey!  He had it better than Jeremiah because many listened to him but in the end it cost him his head, literally.
Can you imagine someone telling John his ministry might be better if he would dress like a regular guy and lay off the bugs? Don't you think God had something to do with his attire and appetite?



My point here Gems is who are we to tell someone else how to do what the Lord asked them to do? Even if we don't get it.  Now I'm not talking about things that are obviously opposed to the nature of God or the word of God but just because it's different than our normal doesn't mean it's abnormal for God or dare I say, wrong.

Some of the things the Lord asks us to do is just practice, for us to learn to hear His voice and for obedience to see if we will do it. 
For example, years ago I was visiting a church I had never been to before. It was a huge church that  had 3 other campuses linked into the live service I was at. This is normal today but years ago this was a new concept for me.

I have a regular occurrence with the Holy Spirit when He's getting ready to ask me to do something that makes me uncomfortable. The tips of my fingers get really cold, not the whole finger just the tips.  Now I'm already feeling awkward because I don't know anyone so when my fingers start to get cold I say to him (The Holy Spirit) under my breath "I don't know what your up to but don't even think about it!" To which He starts a conversation with me that goes something like this:

Holy Spirit: you know that little song you sing to me?
Me: NO
Holy Spirit: You know the one,  I love you Lord  and I lift my voice to worship you Oh, my soul rejoice! Take joy my King In what You hear Let it be a sweet, sweet sound in Your ear.
Me: coy smile, yes and you're the only one who likes it because we both know I can't sing.

At this very moment in the service the worship leader stops singing and says "I just got a stirring from the Holy Spirit. If there's someone out there that has a song for the Lord please just start singing it and the rest of us will join you."

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you mean us like the hundreds possible thousands of people in this building and who knows how many watching in on video???? Those people??

You could have heard a pin drop as the entire sanctuary went silent. And the worship leader just waited..... He just kept encouraging us to respond to the Holy Spirit. I was responding alright there was a full blown conversation going on in my head.

I figured any minute this guy would go onto something else but NOOOOO he just waited and I'm not kidding, no one said a word (cricket sound) by now my finger tips are freezing and in spite of my reasoning and desperate begging I know this is not going to go away.
So here I go, I begin to sing.  I use that term loosely, as my voice was literally trembling and using a key I'm sure is not on any note scale known to man.

The guy next to me looks at me with a face of disbelief and the worship leader is kind of squinting his face almost like he's in pain trying to figure out what the heck I'm singing so the joining in can happen soon. Gems it was the longest most humiliating moment of my life and trust me I have had many.

I look back on that day many times and have a good laugh but know I passed the obedience test for sure on that day. What I want you to take from this is we have no idea what God tells people to do or how to do it. Anyone who knew me would have said you ARE NOT hearing from God, we have heard you sing!
So let's just pray for each other, especially when it's out of "our" normal. Pray we will hear God clearly and have the strength to make the hard decisions. Pray the Holy Sprit will convict us if we are off course, trust me He has no problem getting His point across.

Who knows He could be grooming YOU to be his next megaphone preacher. Whatever it is He will give you the words and strength to finish the task.

                                             ♫ May it be a sweet sweet sound in His ear♫

Wandering in the Wilderness

 

The wilderness, ever been there? You feel like you’re wandering around aimlessly. Like every door you knock on is the wrong one and every street you drive down becomes a dead end.

Your world around you can seem like it's unraveling and your not quite sure how to get it back on track.

 

Most of us are familiar with this verse in Romans,

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.

 

We like to recite that verse and claim it in public to others but I think we forget sometimes that you actually have to be in a not so good situation in order for God to work it out. You can’t just claim that God will work it out if you’re not living in it. What I mean is you have to actually be going through the thing you need to have worked out. And that Gems can be an unnerving experience, a true test of faith.

 

Believe it or not the wilderness times can actually be the most holy times we experience with God. It’s in the all things or wilderness times we are in a place to actually hear God the most.

 

God brought Moses into the wilderness to speak to him through a burning bush. (Exodus 3)

It was also in the wilderness God gave the Holy 10 commandments and the law to Moses. (Leviticus)

It was in the wilderness that Elijah heard God’s still small voice. (1Kings 19)

John the Baptist was also in the wilderness when he heard a holy word from God.

Luke 3:2 Annas and Caiaphas were the high priests. At this time a message from God came to John son of Zechariah, who was living in the wilderness.

 

John had another extremely holy experience in the wilderness, on the island of Patmos, where he was a prisoner.

Revelation 1:9 John, your brother and companion in the suffering and kingdom and patient endurance that are ours in Jesus, was on the island of Patmos because of the word of God and the testimony of Jesus.

10 On the Lord’s Day I was in the Spirit, and I heard behind me a loud voice like a trumpet, 11 which said: “Write on a scroll what you see and send it to the seven churches: to Ephesus, Smyrna, Pergamum, Thyatira, Sardis, Philadelphia and Laodicea

 

So I think it’s safe to say that God does indeed lead us into a holy wilderness where He not only speaks to us but we hear Him loud and clear. Rather than kicking and fighting your wilderness experience take a deep breath and embrace it. Consider that you may very well be on holy ground.  Press in and ask the Lord if there's something He's trying to tell or teach you.

 

I would love to tell you that I have always done this but that would be a lie. It’s something I’m still working at.  Now when I’m in what feels like a desert I’m reminding myself of the goodness of God. We have to believe that God is good and wants what’s best for us in order to stand on the verse in Romans, that He will work all things out for our good. You need to first believe He wants what’s best for you.

 

A few months ago I saw a quote I knew the Lord was using to speak to me, it said:

“Not all those who wander are lost”

 

About 2 weeks later my sister sent me a card and guess what she wrote in it??? “Not all those who wander are lost”

 

I am once again at a crossroads in my life. The Lord let me know it’s time to resign from my current job, which I did. I will be leaving soon and He has not mentioned where I will be going next. I only know that the end of April or May I will be done with my current job assignment.

Did I mention the middle of May my lease is up on my apartment, my youngest daughter is getting married the end of May, my son and his wife are having their 3^rd child and P.S. I’m not sure if I’m moving.

 

Earlier in my walk I would have been freaking out! But I truly have that peace that passes understanding right now from years of being in and out of the holy wilderness with my Lord. I have truly learned that He does work out all thing for my good!

 

So Gems the next time you’re in a wilderness time instead of focusing on all the stressful circumstances and feeling like you’re wandering around lost, embrace it with an attitude of holiness. Listen carefully there may well be a still small voice trying to tell you something.

 

“Not everyone who wanders is lost”

 

 

 

Either I'm God Or I'm Not

I had an ah ha moment the other day about Mary, Jesus mother. Mary became the Holy of Holies when Christ took up residence in her womb, a place for Jesus to reside. Today if you have a relationship with Jesus your body too becomes a residence for Him and the Holy Spirit.
1 Corinthians 6:19 Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?

Mary carried Jesus physically, we carry Him spiritually.

I know you already knew that but it was one of those truths that I apparently needed to be reminded of. With that said there are times the Lord speaks to us, some refer to it as "getting a word." We have this precious gift of communication with our Lord because of the Holy Spirit who now lives in our temple/body. So when we get a word it is our job to protect it. Don't let anyone steal it.

In John 16 Jesus is talking to His disciples about he Holy Sprit, a new concept to them and perhaps a new concept to you. He tells them in V 13 "But when He, the Spirit of truth, comes, He will guide you into all the truth; for He will not speak on His own initiative, but whatever he hears, He will speak; and He will disclose to you what is to come."

Just pause and let that sink in for a moment.....

How many times have you asked, God what is coming next??????
I need way more then 2 hands to count that.
Encouragement #1 the Lord will tell the Holy Spirit to speak to you HOWEVER you may not always like what He says.
Case in point.

Years ago when I first began this unexplainable ride of faith and the Lord was emptying me spiritually, emotionally and physically I would pray like a crazy women.
"What are we doing, where are we going, how are we going to pull this off how, how, why, why....

I am not kidding Gems when I tell you that for a year straight , Every time I prayed He responded with the same answer "Either I'm God or I'm not." -  What if - "Either I'm God or I'm not" - How can - "Either I'm God or I'm not." BUT... "Either I'm God or I'm not."

I am not exaggerating here. I got to the point that I would say "OK God I'm getting ready to talk to you and SERIOUSLY, I know who you are so PLEASE don't say what I think you're going to say!!!! And when I was done He said, you guessed it, Either I'm God or I'm not.

AHHHHHHHHH!!! What's the deal here? Jesus said the Holy Spirit would speak what He hears the Father say, did God not think the Holy Spirit could handle more than 6 words over a 12 month period?? Did He not think I was able to comprehend more than 6 words??
I would be sooooooo frustrated!

I like to make the Bible personal when I read it so verse 14 says "He shall glorify Me; for He shall take of Mine, and shall disclose it to Gena."

Maybe I needed to look up "glorify me" because that is not the emotion I felt when I got the pat answer to my desperate prayers.
Oh there were other glorifying answers to my on going questions like, where will we live now that my house is foreclosed? Being a Realtor it was only natural that I would look at possible homes as I was driving around town because the Holy Spirit told me God had my next house picked out and everything I needed would be provided.
Yet every time I looked at a house I would hear God say "you can pick it or I will."

It was different than "either I'm God or I'm not" but honestly just as frustrating.

Gems I had to protect the word the Lord gave me from everyone who told me I was crazy and from those that thought they knew Him better than the Holy Spirit when they said things like, God wouldn't do this or that.
I had to hold on to the truth that the Holy Spirit lived in me and He would only tell me what He heard the Father say. Even if it were 6 word answers. It didn't matter that  I couldn't explain anything that was happening in my life I knew that I knew that God was speaking to me and His word, the Bible confirmed it.

The reality is I had no idea that down the road in my journey the Lord would ask me to do other things that I would need greater faith to handle. Greater revelations than a trivial thing like what my address would be. Things larger then where will I work. I needed to know I served a God who had so much more power. It was His grace and truly to His glory for me to REALLY believe that He was God!!! That there was nothing impossible for Him!
That I was adequate and equipped to handle any assignment no matter how inexperienced I was or am, because I had experienced His plan in my life first hand and I knew that HE IS GOD!

Those words, either I'm God or I'm not, have become a source of comfort to me. To this day, every time I find myself in a situation I have no control over or I'm overcome with fear or exhaustion I gently remind myself of my past and slowly a smile will come over my heart and face as I now hear Him say, "I AM GOD."

Gems, I pray this reminder encourages you in your journey. I hope it shows you that the Holy Spirit tells us what we are ready for at the time. I pray your stability and security grow knowing God is adequate for you at all times. I don't know what questions you're asking Him right now but I do know the answer, either He's God over your life or He's not. Either you believe Him or you don't. It's really that simple.

Psalm 32:8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.

Thank you God that your eyes are always upon me.