Gross Servant

 God don't let me be a gross servant. This has been my prayer the past few weeks. You see on the outside it would appear I have this servant thing down. I truly do love people and I sincerely love to serve God's children BUT what if you could lift up my sea of servant hood. What would you see there? What trash would you find? If you pull back my servant heart is it completely the servant heart of God?

I wish I could tell you it was but I would be lying to both of us hence my prayer not to be a gross servant.

There is this constant battle that goes on inside of me.

I wish I could blame the devil like this picture portrays but that would be another lie. It's my own selfish desires that I battle. My need to feel important or needed. My desire for recognition or my own sense of pride. I know, I warned you this was going to be gross.

A few weeks ago I listened to a sermon about being asleep.  
Revelation 3:1“To the angel of the church in Sardis write:these are the words of him who holds the seven spirits of God and the seven stars. I know your deeds; you have a reputation of being alive, but you are dead. 2 Wake up! Strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have found your deeds unfinished in the sight of my God.3 Remember, therefore, what you have received and heard; hold it fast, and repent. But if you do not wake up, I will come like a thief, and you will not know at what time I will come to you.

 I started asking God where I was asleep. Gems as I have told you before if you ask He will tell you.....

 Gross Servant.

My prayer is God will strip me of these motives, that he will take away all my self-contentedness til there's nothing left of me.

He gave me a wonderful example this weekend of how He doesn't need me but in spite of my  junk will still use me with all my grossness.

 

My daughter and I went to the Leesburg Bike festival last weekend to minister to bikers or anyone God would lead to us. I ordered these cool tracks to hand out.

I did get to hand some out but God wanted to remind me He doesn't need me. This was part of my awakening. 

He told me to put the tracks on the table across from me. I called it my Jesus table. I also had a small box for prayer request.

I thought I was going to hand out all the tracks personally but God wanted me to see that He would draw those He prepared for that day. One by one I watched as random people sat in the “Jesus chair” and read His word with no help from me.

Do you see this mans face? He is contemplating the word of God in the middle of a busy street filled with the noise of motorcycles, loud motorcycles, yet he could still hear the Holy Spirit.

I was in awe of the reminder of just how powerful the word of God is and the love that those words represent.

I continue to pray that my servants heart will be transformed. I continue to plead that I will not be a gross servant. I ask God to strip me of my human needs and to open the eyes of my heart and fill me with His Spirit so I may experience the power of the Holy Spirit with a pure heart.

Ephesians 1:18-21 I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every name that is invoked, not only in the present age but also in the one to come.

Help me Jesus to serve like you.