What Do You Reflect?

I had something really exciting happen last week. Some of you may have heard but for the rest, I had my first paid speaking engagement! I was so excited about it I posted an announcement on Facebook! The Lord told me years ago I would be a crier for Him. When He first said it I thought he meant crier like crying and I wasn't totally thrilled. The Holy Spirit went on to say I would cry out the gospel to lost and hurt people. I liked that plan better.
I have been speaking for quite some time whether at small groups in my home, at my church or when asked to meet with groups at other churches but it has always been on a volunteer basis. I'm not complaining it's just what it has been. My hearts desire however is to have speaking be a way I make a living. Those of you who know me know it's the shutting up I have the problem with :)
I'll get real here with you. These are some of the thoughts I have when I'm dreaming big. It would be nice to actually drive to see someone or a group and know I have enough gas in my car to get there. It would be nice to have my people call your people and set up a lunch appointment. It would be nice to have a microphone sometimes so I'm not screaming at people. It would be nice to have someone carry in my table, chair, sign and books instead of me so when I get up to speak I'm not sweating my face off. It would be nice to have my hair and nails done before I speak or have someone do my makeup so when I'm wearing lipstick it doesn't look like I just ate spaghetti sauce. You know what I'm saying.
I have been speaking into peoples lives for over 20 years and have never given up the dream of doing this for a living. I need you to follow me here because I'm not bragging I am truly beyond humbled and honored anytime the Lord let's me speak into one of His children's lives.
With that said, I gotta tell ya Gems I was so excited when I got a check for speaking and was able to put gas in my car for the next appointment. I hope it's the beginning of more opportunities to do what I love and get paid for it.
Gems, I'm not unlike any of you that dream about my future. I dream of speaking to larger crowds and having more financial blessings.
There are so many people out there hurting and needing to hear a word from God, He needs all of us to do our part. This got me thinking about Jesus and a verse in Matthew.
Matthew 9:36 When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.
Read it again from the Message Bible
Matthew 9:36 Then Jesus made a circuit of all the towns and villages. He taught in their meeting places, reported kingdom news, and healed their diseased bodies, healed their bruised and hurt lives. When he looked out over the crowds, his heart broke. So confused and aimless they were, like sheep with no shepherd.
Jesus felt compassion for the people, His heart was broke when He looked over the sea of people that so desperately needed a Savior. That so desperately needed Him. Because He is Jesus He knew exactly what each person was suffering with or from. He knew every tear that was shed and every harmful word that was spoken to EVERY person in that crowd! You can see why His heart would be breaking.
Honestly I could not bare to know all that hurt at once. That can only be handled by Jesus but, it would still be great to be used by God in a large setting. Like Joyce Meyer or Beth Moore, no I'm not comparing myself to them but hey you might as well dream big right?
Today however, I had an experience that reminded me of something very special. How very important it is for intimate moments with people. I had the privilege of giving a word of encouragement to a beautiful woman today. As we sat and drank coffee together God revealed things to me to share with her. These were things only He would know about. It was a way to show her that Jesus not only saw her wounded heart, He also wanted to speak to the exact location of the wound. The place that we become experts at hiding. A place we would never share in front of a bunch of people we don't know.
Because there wasn't a large crowd and I wasn't up on a stage we were able to have face to face, eye to eye contact. For just a moment I could see into her soul and she could see the eyes of Jesus looking back at her. Let me explain that.
This is part of a verse in the Bible where Jesus is speaking to His disciples,
Matthew 9bAnyone who has seen me has seen the Father.
The people were saying they had never seen God and Jesus responds with the above verse. I started really thinking about His words and hoped that verse was true about me. Since Jesus now lives in me I should be able to say, If you have seen Gena, you have seen the Father. I should be a reflection of Jesus.
So when I'm looking into the eyes of someone who is hurting they can be looking back into the eyes of the Father.
You try it.
If you have seen (your name here) you have seen the Father.
That is some powerful stuff right there.
I say all this Gems to tell you there is nothing like one on one contact with another person and allowing your self to be the reflection of Jesus to them. To hold their hand, cry with them, pray with them, hug on them. These things can only be done when your right in front of someone.
I'm not disqualifying being taught and encouraged in a large arena I'm just saying both are just as important. So if God decides to move me in that direction and I can make a living speaking GREAT! If He decides to leave things just as they are I can honestly still say GREAT! If He decides to do both, hey I'm a meat and potatoes girl that's great too.
I want my main goal to reflect Jesus to others. To be able to say “If you have seen me you have seen the Father.”
Proverbs 27:19 As water reflects a face, so a man's heart reflects the man.

No Jesus, No Peace

I have been thinking lately about God telling us to pray Peace for Israel. I have been doing that but it seemed odd to me that God would tell me to pray for peace. When I read the Bible there is not much peace for Israel. In Revelation there is more war prophesied, to the point God tells the Israelites when they see certain signs to run for the hills and hide in caves.
I felt like my prayers for peace were against the word of God, for what He has planned, so I asked Him about it.
The Holy Spirit gave me a very profound answer. He started His answer by asking me some questions.
What is one of the names of Jesus?
Answer: Prince of Peace
Isaiah 9:6 For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
What was the problem with Israel when Christ came?
Answer: They didn't believe He was the son of God so they didn't accept Him as their Savior.
Romans 10:1 Brothers and sisters, my heart’s desire and prayer to God for the Israelite is that they may be saved. 2 For I can testify about them that they are zealous for God, but their zeal is not based on knowledge. 3 Since they did not know the righteousness of God and sought to establish their own, they did not submit to God’s righteousness 4 Christ is the culmination of the law so that there may be righteousness for everyone who believes.
You see I was praying for peace as in war but I am now praying for the peace of God through His son Jesus Christ. Perhaps that's what God means. I should be praying what Paul says in the above verse, that they (Israelite) may be saved. The only true peace we can have is through the Holy Spirit which we receive when we accept Christ.
God is all about peace through unity . He speaks of it often in the Bible.
Ephesians 4:3 Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism; 6 one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.
We have all kinds of denominations but God said there would be one rock that He would build His church on. This message came first to the chosen children of Israel. When it was not completely accepted it was made available to the Gentiles, the rest of us, but God's heart is always for His children Israel and that none should perish.
God has a lot to say about us having peace that comes through unity.
Psalm 133:1 How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!
John 17:23 I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.
Ephesians 4:3 Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
Ephesians 4:11 So Christ himself gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, 12 to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up 13 until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.
Funny I don't think much has changed since the beginning of time. God is still trying to get all His children together in unity and peace. I believe we are supposed to pray for the peace of salvation for Israel. Pray for when the end times come that we will be a unified body of believers. This could be a prayer for all denominations not just the Jewish people. We are all one body.
1Corinthians 12:12 Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. 13 For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. 14 Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many.
Ephesians 1:10 to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.
The final word the Holy Spirit gave me was “pray for peace for Israel. ”
Gems I thought I would share this teaching moment I had with the Holy Spirit. I hope it will encourage you to pray and maybe help you as it did me to understand why we should pray for peace for Israel. The peace that passes all understanding.
Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

No Jesus, No Peace, Know Jesus, Know Peace

Greatest Volunteer

I’m writing this jewel to all the volunteers out there. I know that volunteering can be one of the most thankless jobs you ever encounter. There have been many times when I’m at soup kitchen and we are serving a meal that was generously donated to us to serve our brothers and sisters and people complain about the food. I know when I was feeding my family with food given to me by a local restaurant I was grateful to have it regardless that it was the same food every week. There are times we bring clothes and someone will take most of them and we find out later they sold them. We have people that take meals for their “friends” that aren’t there or the ones who are drunk or mentally unstable that just plain yell at us for whatever's ailing them. We deal with the ones who may smell offensive or whose breath is so bad I have to hold mine while talking to them. There are a lot of reasons not to volunteer at soup kitchen and I’m sure if you’re a volunteer of any kind you may have your own list. BUT I want to tell you why I will never stop volunteering.

 
Matthew 25:40-45 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’ “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’ “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

Those are some powerful words and I want to do whatever I can for my sweet Jesus.
There’s another reason I volunteer. I love when I see a person’s life transformed by the love of God through the hands of His people, me and you.

 
Like when I see a guest show up for the first time and he or she is holding onto everything they have for dear life and after a few months they are giving some of what they have to a late comer who has nothing. Or when they get back on their feet and come back and help us serve. When a guy who used to show up drunk and angry is now leading a prayer before we leave the site. Or the woman who is pregnant and is going to have an abortion but because you loved her past her decision she decides to give her baby up for adoption and you just happened to know who she can contact to help her with that. Maybe you’re the one that’s lucky enough to lead someone to the Lord because you loved her past her smell. I have made friends with some of our guest that I truly treasure. These are just a few examples, I’m sure you have a bunch you could add.

I want to share one very special one with you. It’s about my dear friend Brenda. I met Brenda about 2 years ago. She is a trip to say the least. She’s originally from Rhode Island and like some of us her life took one turn after another for the worse and before she knew it she was homeless, living in Florida behind a vacant building on her own. When we hear the word homeless we tend to get a visual of someone uneducated or an alcoholic or drug addict but in today’s economy that is not the case. Brenda is far from uneducated, truth be told she’s way smarter than me. She’s vibrant and beautiful, witty, charming and a definite leader. How she got where she was is not important, how she left where she was is. I was honored to lead Brenda to the Lord and hang out with her every Tuesday night. I never sugar coated my message to her and trust me she never sugar coated hers. I remember I didn’t go to soup kitchen one night and didn’t let her know I wasn’t going to be there and I got a text the next day from her that read "What The F… where were you last night." If that offends you, get over it. I was thrilled that she felt comfortable being real with me and more than that she missed me!

 
I had the honor of helping Brenda see herself the way Christ saw her. I asked her one time why she didn’t go back home and she said she was scared. This blew my mind. I'm thinking what could be scarier than sleeping behind a vacant building outside in the cold and rain and heat of summer. I told her she was one of the bravest women I ever met.

 
Brenda was known to hang out at the local Burger King during the day so I would randomly show up there and take her to lunch or just hang out and pray with her.
OK so where am I going with this? I’m so excited I can barley type. Brenda finally tied up her loose ends here in Florida and decided to go back to Rhode Island and bring closure to things she left behind there. As much as I wanted her to leave and begin a new life in Christ I hated to see her go. I will miss her terribly.

We said our goodbyes a few weeks ago at the soup kitchen site and a group of us prayed over her. I hadn’t heard from her and was beginning to get nervous. A couple of weeks ago I went to my Wednesday morning Bible study and I usually shut off my phone or mute it but felt like the Lord said to leave it on so I did. My phone did ring and when I looked down I saw a Rhode Island number! My heart literally leaped in my chest.

It was my Brenda on the other end and she was at the hospital with her whole family. She told me her aunt was dying. She said a priest came in to pray and I don’t know her exact words but it was something like “I was like what the heck kind of praying is this! That’s not how Gena prays. It did nothing for me so I needed to call you and have you pray.” I laughed and said I would pray for her but she needed to get her butt back in the room and do the praying for the family. I told her I didn’t spend all that time training her for her to call me to pray.” She laughed and agreed she could do it. Brenda told me how much she was missing me and the gang from Tuesday night and at that moment the Holy Spirit gave me a message for her.

He told me to remind her that the Brenda her family knew no longer existed but they didn’t know that yet. They were relating to the old Brenda and for her not to go back to that one, that she was and is a new creation in Christ Jesus.

2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! 

I told her the Lord sent her back at exactly the right time for her to pray for her aunt and her whole family. I reminded her that she needed to give her family time to meet the new Brenda. I told her it may take a little while but her transformation was already done and the only way that would change was if she changed it. We had a great conversation and it was so good to hear her voice.
Gems being a volunteer can be a thankless job but moments like these are priceless.

 
Mark 4:30-32 Again he said, “What shall we say the kingdom of God is like, or what parable shall we use to describe it? It is like a mustard seed, which is the smallest of all seeds on earth. Yet when planted, it grows and becomes the largest of all garden plants, with such big branches that the birds can perch in its shade.”

To me this is what volunteering is about. We plant the smallest seeds in peoples lives, believers and non believers and watch what the Holy Spirit grows. The seed planted in us becomes shelter, protection, encouragement and love to those who find shelter in our branches. This gives us an opportunity to do for the least of these and share the love of God with our brothers and sisters.
Fellow Volunteers I hope this will encourage you to keep doing what you’re doing especially when you feel like no one really cares if your there or not. Someone not only cares He's hoping you obey, His name is Jesus and He truly was the greatest volunteer!

Living Sacrifices

We have all heard the Christmas story or seen the children's plays with the wise men, manger and barn animals. Even the characters of Charlie Brown did a sweet warm and fuzzy Christmas play. I'm sure you have seen at least one or have been hearing the Christmas story read from Luke at your church.
True story:
In 1984 I was living in Stuarts Draft Virginia. Don't ask.... It was a small town with country folk and a local Baptist church which the kids and I attended occasionally. Anthony and Amanda were 3 and 4 at the time and were asked to be a part of the live Nativity scene. The church also had a small singing Christmas tree made up of the even smaller choir. When I went to drop off my little shepherds a woman grabbed me and said something like thank God your here Mary Beth got the flu and we have an empty spot on the singing Christmas tree! Before I knew it she was slapping a red hat on my head and someone else was applying blush to my face to give my cheeks some color. I probably had no color because I was horrified! I tried to explain that not only do I not sing but I didn't know any of the songs to which they replied just move your lips and smile. There I was on the 2nd row of the singing Christmas tree with the towns people and local TV crew! Oh it get's better, just before the music starts Anthony yells “mommy the cows are REAL!” Spoken like a true New Yorker.
OK, back to the jewel. I want to talk about Mary and the decision she made to be obedient to what God called her to do. Her decision to literally make her body a living sacrifice.
Romans 12:1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.
When Mary agreed to being a pregnant virgin I'm sure the people back then believed her story about as much as people would today. Not even Joseph, her fiancee believed her angel story.
Joseph's plan was to send her away. In all fairness to Joseph if my brother came to me and told me his fiancee was pregnant with someone else baby I may very well tell him to end the relationship too. What say you?
Matthew 1:19 Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.
Great way to start your marriage. We know an Angel comes to Joseph later and explains things so Joseph believes Mary but the Angel didn't appear to everyone. I'm sure Mary's friends and dare I say family might have thought Joseph was just covering for Mary. But Mary had decided that day before the angel Gabriel to make her body a living sacrifice to God.
I'm sure she put up with a lot of trash talk and self righteous people looking down on her. I'm sure she felt the glaring eyes and heard conversations suddenly stop when she got close enough to hear. Or put up with the hurtful words of those who wanted her to hear their condemning comments.
Gems I'm sure Mary didn't have the sweet Christmas play experience we sing carols to.
We see in the scriptures it didn't end. Jesus was in his 30's when He began His ministry and the snide remarks about his birth were still being made. We see it in the book of John when Jesus was having a discussion with some of the Jews.
John 8:41 "You are doing the works of your own father.” “We are not illegitimate children,” they protested. “The only Father we have is God himself.”
The New King James version says: You do the deeds of your father.” Then they said to Him, “We were not born of fornication; we have one Father—God.”
I'm sure these comments still hurt Mary, after all they were talking about her son. Nothing about Mary's decision to offer her body as a living sacrifice was easy. Not Jesus life and most of all not his death.
I know this may be an odd jewel for Christmas but with all the emphasis on giving gifts I thought maybe we, me included, could really think about the verse in Romans and ask ourselves how much are we willing to offer? How far out of our comfort zone are we willing to go? How much of ourselves are we willing to give back to God and at what cost? Maybe we could really stretch ourselves as a gift back to our sweet Savior who died to give us the ultimate gift of eternal life. What is God asking you to give Him?
(Message Bible) Romans 12:1-2 So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

Gems let's go beyond reading just the birth of our Lord at the manger scene, let's encounter the power of the living word of God and transform our lives into living sacrifices and truly worship the King of Kings!

I Wanna Hold Your hand

I came out of church last week and saw the cutest little boy walking with his dad. He had one hand tightly wrapped around his dad’s finger and the other waving in the air hoping to grab a passerby. He was just learning to walk so it was more like the zombie walk, you know legs far apart, knees not bending wobbling from side to side. Actually I have seen some grown men come out of a bar walking very similar to that but that’s another story.
Anyway as I passed by the toddler grabbed for my hand and the dad said “yea he’s still reaching for that other hand to be held even though I got this on.”
This of course got me thinking about all of us and our walk with the Lord. Even though we know He has us, holding our hand so to speak, we are still reaching out for the world to grab the other hand. For some reason we still need the “safety” of knowing the world has us. As if our Heavenly Father’s hand isn’t strong enough to hold onto us.
Isaiah 40:10-11 Behold, the Lord God shall come with a strong hand. And his arm shall rule for Him, and His work before Him. He will feed His flock like a shepherd. And carry them in His bosom. And gently lead those who are with young.
Years ago when my oldest son was going through his rebellious/alien stage and he was involved with drug dealing I had been praying and believing the Lord would work it all out because He promised He would. I was pretty secure in that promise until the Lord tested me on it. Anthony had made yet another poor decision and borrowed money, a lot of money, from these drug dealers. When he could not pay it back when he was supposed to things got ugly. He began getting threatening calls to hurt him and our family. My grandson was just a baby and the thought of someone hurting him was more then I could take. Anthony’s house was broken into and a list of things I just assume forget starting hitting our family. Anthony finally asked me if I could take out a loan against my home to pay off the debt. You have to understand how dangerous this was for Anthony to even ask me to do this. I was a single mom with no one to run to and tell me it would be all better. I was scared and I allowed the fear to become bigger then my God and began to panic. I started imagining all kinds of horrible things happening to my kids and grandson. Every time the phone rang my heart sunk thinking it was the hospital or the police calling with terrible news.
The Lord told me to leave it alone that He would handle it BUT as weeks turned into months and the threats increased my faith began to falter. My son would call me regularly asking if I knew anyone we could borrow the money from.
One day out of the blue I got one of those pre-qualified letters saying all I had to do was sign and they would mail me a check. A big check. This was when the banks were still giving money away to anyone who asked. I held that letter in my hands for a few days knowing the Lord said not to use it. Finally the pressure was more than I could take and I mailed in the letter and within a few days had a check in my hand. I tried to justify that if the Lord didn’t want me to have it I wouldn’t have gotten it but that Gems was a lie and I knew it. The Lord was testing me to see if my faith in Him to handle the situation was real or not. Was I going to hold his hand or grab from the world with the one flailing about.
I can’t tell you how badly I wanted to give the check to my son as I could see the pressure wearing on him as well and he was desperate for me to help him in some way. Seeing my first born struggle like this, even though it was his doing, was so hard for me and I wanted to rescue him with everything in me. I was also worried about my oldest daughter living alone and wanted her to move home.
I called a friend of mine and she met me in a store parking lot and I showed her the check and asked her to pray with me. With tears streaming down my face I begged the Lord to use the money so we could end this nightmare. His answer was loving but firm, no. He reminded me that His way would be better for Anthony and would bring Him glory in the end. Gems we forget that the Lord tells us to praise Him in all things and He shares His glory with no one. As I sat there crying I ripped up the check. It was one of the hardest things I ever did. The Lord proved to me that holding His hand was enough I didn’t need the worlds.
The Lord did amazing things with that event and Anthony was able to witness to these lost men in a way that would have never been possible if we would have just given them the check.
Deuteronomy 3:24 ‘O Lord GOD, You have begun to show Your servant Your greatness and Your mighty hand, for what god is there in heaven or on earth who can do anything like Your works and Your mighty deeds?” You see Gems we love the scriptures’ of how God will take care of us and we believe them as long as they happen within our time frame but when we feel God is taking to long we think we need to grab someone else's hand.
Isaiah 59:1 Behold, the Lord’s hand is not shortened. That it cannot save; nor His ear heavy that it cannot hear.
I have another friend who’s close to retiring and every time she sees me the first thing she asks is if I’m working. I have been in and out of jobs since she’s known me and I think it ruffles her feathers when I’m not working because I don’t worry about it.
I told her I was between jobs at the time and she asked “are you OK with that?” I said yes but I knew she was asking if I thought God was OK with it. I wanted to ask this friend, who has been counting down the days to retirement, if for some reason when she retired her company went bankrupt and there was no retirement pay would she still be OK with the Lord?
Would she still trust that God would provide for her? Would she be angry that she stayed all those years at this company so she could get a retirement and now there was none? Was she holding the Lord’s hand or her companies?
Don’t get me wrong Gems I’m not saying retirement is a bad thing, praise God for those who have been such committed employees but we need to remember that the job and the pay we receive week after week is all from the Lord. He just uses our jobs to send us the money, it’s still His money.
Gems we need to trust that everything that goes on in our lives has gone through the Lord’s hands first and He is more than capable. The question is are we capable of giving praise to Him regardless of the situations we may find ourselves in? Are we willing to not grab what the world may try to offer as a substitute for God’s plan?
Psalm 48:10 According to Your name, O God, So is Your praise to the ends of the earth; Your right hand is full of righteousness. Gems there is a peace that goes beyond understanding when we get to this place of knowing God’s hand is enough. The way you look at everything in life changes when you realize you never were in control and your job is to be obedient and let God be God.
The other night I had the most amazing experience with the Lord. I was in bed, just laying there feeling the Lord’s presence in such an intimate way. I gently fell asleep and would get that jerky feeling and it would wake me up. It happened about 10 times in a row and then I finally fell asleep. The next day I Googled to find out what causes that jerky feeling that wakes us thinking something was wrong with me that it happened so many times. Later the Lord told me HE was waking me up so the moment wouldn't end so soon. He would have continued to feel my presence but I would have fallen asleep and no longer felt His. Is He romantic or what!
Gems this is the kind of relationship Jesus wants to have with all of us. In the wedding ceremony when the groom takes his new brides hand there is no other hand in the picture it’s just the two of them, this is the relationship your Savior wants with you.
Psalm 95:7 For He is our God, And we are the people of His pasture, And the sheep of His hand. It may feel weird at first and you may feel a little unsteady like that toddler I saw but your daddy will hold onto you just as tight. So go ahead, reach for it, He wants to hold your hand!

We Must Forgive, But We Must Never Forget

On Veterans Day I went to the local Messianic Temple to worship our Lord and there was a man there named Peter who was born in a concentration camp. He came to share his story with the congregation and I was blessed to visit on such an honorable occasion. Peter had the sweetest spirit I have ever seen, he had a kind gentle voice and a smile that could warm the coldest heart. Peter told one horrific story after another about the inhumane things that happened to him in this camp and I squirmed in my seat finding it hard to listen never less experience. He shared his story from the beginning, stories like the way his skull was opened and drugs filled his body to watch the reaction or the endless beatings for no reasons. He talked about unborn babies that were cut form their mother’s wombs and how he was thankful his mother was spared that horror. The emaciated bodies that were piled high with some still barley breathing. I would begin to feel sick and Peter would solemnly pause and with love and compassion say “we must never forget, but we must forgive.” He would wait a moment for us to take in his words before he continued.
He shared about the beatings he watched the Nazi soldiers do to his parents and how cold it was in the camps. He shared how they took women outside naked in 30 below zero weather and poured water on their feet to watch their toes break off. As a five year old he watched his best friend a six year old little girl being raped by multiple soldiers. He would pause and warmly look at us and say “we must never forget, but we must forgive.”
He shared his final days in Poland and the beatings that followed before arriving in the United States to be reunited with his mother who he only had vague memories of. His hopes of a better life were quickly crushed as he arrived in the States only to be greeted by the Klu Klux Klan and another life of hate and rejection. Peter had no idea why he was hated and didn’t speak English to even begin to understand.
When you didn’t think you could stand another moment of his story again Peter would pause and say “we must never forget, but we must forgive.”
Peter shared the later part of his testimony and going back to the concentration camp with his family and the emotions it brought up inside of him. Honestly Gems I don’t know how he even went back. He said he got physically ill and had his son take him back to the hotel they were staying at. Peter went on to tell how the Lord spoke to him and told him to go back to the camp. Peter asked the Lord what he missed and asked him to show him at the hotel as he didn’t want to go back. He shared this part of the story with a lump in his throat and tears in his eyes and it was all I could do not to run up and hug him. The Lord told him he must go back to the camp and forgive those who tortured him and he understandably said no. He did end up obeying the Holy Spirit and returning the place of his pain. God told Peter that he understood the pain and rejection he endured and reminded him of what Jesus suffered on the cross for all of us. The Lord told Peter he needed him to forgive so his sins could be forgiven.
Peter said he fell to his knees and forgave the Nazi soldiers and every vile person who caused so much pain and suffering to Peter and the Jewish people. Peter then told us how an overwhelming love began to pour into him, a love so strong he could not contain it all. This was the same love, all these years later, which is still pouring out of this brave and humble man.
When he finished he was laughing and crying at the same time and invited anyone who wanted to come forward and he would pray for them. There was an older man in the congregation whose grown son helped him up and held the arm of his frail body as they made their way to Peter. This man also spoke Polish and when he got to Peter he wept and hugged Peter then gently kissed him on the cheek. The embrace was so heart felt you knew at that moment these men shared something the rest of us could never and I hope will never understand.
When it was my turn I also wept and hugged Peter and told him how sorry I was for all that happened to him. Again he looked at me with eyes that I know represent my sweet Jesus. Eyes of love and forgiveness and he just hugged me back and reminded me of our Savior’s love and what He did on the cross for me.
I decided to spare you Peter’s entire story but I pray you will not disregard the message. Gems we must never forget the past but we MUST forgive as our Savior forgives.

I Can't Do This Alone

Well Gems it's time for yet another confession. You see what happened was....
I was at the church on a Tuesday night getting ready to go feed the homeless which I love to do. What I don't always love to do is some of the jobs of the leaders but that's why we have leaders.
We have a dress code requirement for all the volunteers for a few reasons, one we represent the Lord and another is safety issues as we don't always have sober guest. We get a lot of teens who either need to do community service hours or they are doing volunteer work for their college transcript. We also have teens that come just because they love the Lord and want to serve.
On this particular night we had a new group of teenage girls and they were definitely not in dress code. They had on short shorts and low cut tops. It's a delicate situation because I need to tell them the dress code without offending them because we want them to be a part of the ministry (FYI this happens with adults too not just teens) I explained to the girls that we had a dress code and it was for their safety and they would have to change their clothes before leaving.
The Lord had already provided for the situation because before I left my house my teenage daughter Jessica gave me a bag of clothes to give away and in that bag were multiple pairs of jeans and sweat pants that of course would fit these girls.
Right before we left another girl showed up and one of the other leaders handed her a T-shirt to keep the “girls” properly covered. I have never had that particular problem so didn't think to have shirts available :)
We climbed into the van and this group of teens were sitting in the last two rows and they were making negative comments the whole ride to the site about having to change their clothes. I tried to ignore it for as long as possible but just as we drove onto the grounds I hit a breaking point and turned around, with an attitude, and said to the ring leader “listen this dress code is for your safety and if it's a problem for you then maybe you shouldn't come out here.”
Of course there was dead silence in the van and we all got out with an attitude.
The Holy Spirit went to work on me immediately letting me know what I said wasn't a problem but the way I said it definitely was. He told me I should have spoken to the girls in private and lovingly explained to them again how it was for their protection. So I ate crow and went over to the ring leader to apologize for not handling the situation in a loving way.
Gems what happened next I was not ready for. After I pulled the young lady to the side and apologized to her she looked up at me with this sweet innocent face and said “I thought you were calling me a skank.”
This about broke my heart. I took her face in my hand and pulled her chin up to look her in the eyes and told her that couldn't be further from the truth. I wanted her to know just the opposite! That she is a princess in the eyes of her Father in Heaven and He doesn't want anyone looking at her lustfully or misinterpreting what she was wearing as an invitation to come on to her.
Was I ever convicted at that moment of how important it is to speak lovingly to our young girls. We have no idea what they are thinking. I thought if she felt that way maybe the other girls did too. I didn't want them to feel judged in any way so I went over to them and had the same conversation, reminding them how precious they are to God.
Gems it breaks my heart every time I hear a teenage girl talking trash or wearing inappropriate clothes. It also breaks my heart when I hear teen boys talking about pursuing girls to have sex. I want so badly for them to know how important they are to God and how much He values them. I want to save them from all the hurt and heartache I went through by looking for love in ALL the wrong places. I didn't wear skimpy clothing because I was so self conscious of my body but the results were the same.
It's an ongoing battle for us as parents to fight for our kids. And yes there are many teens who know who they are in Christ and have decided not to give themselves away before marriage and we need to be praying for them to stay strong.
Sometimes I think we put so much focus on the ones who have fallen that we don't spend enough time cheering on the ones who haven't.
Being a parent is not an easy job. I'm not just talking about purity issues I'm talking about our teens self esteem as a whole.
Do you remember what it was like to be a teenager? I do and it was very dramatic, everything was so huge to me.
It's especially hard if you have teens that won't talk to you. My Amanda was one of those.
True story:
Amanda had been giving me the silent treatment for weeks and I had no idea why. She would look at me with such disgust and it was apparent how she felt about me. To say I wasn't feeling the love is an understatement. Finally I had had enough I became psycho woman, I went to her high school soccer practice and followed her around the field. I told her I wasn't leaving until she talked to me. She kept telling me to get off the field they were getting ready to practice and her coach was going to get mad. I told her I didn't give a crap about her practice or her coach and I wasn't leaving. She continued to huff and puff but not speak so I did the only thing I could think of. I jumped on her back, piggy back, wrapped myself around her and said I wasn't leaving til she talked to me. I know a bit extreme, I told you I was psycho by then.
Gems I'm not telling you to be a total freak but I am telling you if we don't fight for our kids no one else will. We the parents have to be the ones to remind them daily how much we love them and more importantly how much God loves them. We need to be in their business, who are they talking to, what are they watching. The internet is the devils playground you better be involved.
I have been guilty of doing so much ministry to people outside my home and not making sure I'm ministering to my own kids. If your kids are in a youth group you better be praying for that leader but remember he or she is not their parent, what you say about them is what they will hear.
Just this morning I was praying asking the Holy Spirit to help me with a current situation with my last teen at home. I have to fight for her just as hard as the ones I have raised but I gotta tell ya I get tired. I can't do this alone I NEED the Lord to show me what to do and how to handle situations so I can be firm but not freakish. To guide her Spirit side in a way that helps her grow into spiritual maturity without trying to control her. There are times I just want to make everything all better for my kids but the situation is not mine to fix.
Our kids need us. I think the more they push you away the more they are screaming on the inside “I NEED YOU!”
There is a song by Sanctus Real that was spot on for me, I copied part of the lyrics below. The part that hit me the most is whether your a single parent or a two parent household we can't do this alone!

I see their faces, look in their innocent eyes
They're just children from the outside
I'm working hard, I tell myself they'll be fine
They're independent
But on the inside, I can hear them saying

"Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight
That I'm still the love of your life
I know we call this our home
But I still feel alone."

So Father, give me the strength
To be everything I am called to be
Oh, Father, show me the way
To lead them
Won't you lead me?

To lead them with strong hands
To stand up when they can't
Don't want to leave them hungry for love
Chasing dreams that I could give up

I'll show them I'm willing to fight
And give them the best of my life
So we can call this our home
Lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

Father, lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

Christian lyrics - LEAD ME LYRICS - SANCTUS REAL

Gems we can't lead them successfully without being led by God ourselves. My prayer today is that all of us will fight and pray for our kids. If you don't have kids, get involved with someone else's remember, we can't do this alone!